Boost Intimacy & Health: 13 Expert-Approved Sex Tips
Why a Healthy Sex Life Matters
Science confirms that sex isn’t just pleasurable—it’s a wellness powerhouse. Each orgasm floods your body with oxytocin (the "bonding hormone"), proven to reduce stress, strengthen heart health, and deepen emotional connections. For couples exploring intimacy products, integrating tools like body-safe vibrators or silky massage lube can amplify these benefits while fostering trust.
Communicate With Your Partner
Couples who openly discuss their desires and fantasies experience more fulfilling intimacy and stronger relationships, according to clinical studies. Sharing preferences—like how to incorporate body-safe adult toys or explore couples’ pleasure kits—can elevate your connection. If vocalizing needs feels challenging, try these solutions:
- Write fantasies in a shared journal to spark curiosity
- Use conversation-starting games to reduce awkwardness
- Pair written notes with sensory tools, such as leaving a love letter alongside a wand vibrator as an invitation
Data shows 72% of couples using communication aids report improved sexual satisfaction—turn vulnerability into adventure with the right tools.
Try Something Different
Spice up your sex life by stretching your boundaries as a couple. Play around with foreplay. Touch each other in new ways. Try out different sex positions to see which ones feel best. Dress up in costumes and play as characters (nurse-doctor, cowboys). Move from the bed to the floor, the bathroom, or the kitchen counter. Watch a dirty movie together. Bring sex toys like a vibrator, anal beads, or feathers into the mix.
Schedule Time for Intimacy
No matter how much you might want to have sex, your busy schedule can get in the way. So pencil sexy time into your calendar, just like you would other important dates. Then you'll be less likely to skip it. Setting a date gives you time to prepare and something to look forward to. Book sex as often as is realistic -- whether it's once a week or every other day. Choose times when you know you won't be tired or distracted.
Exercise
Working out boosts stamina in bed and puts you in the mood. Exercise also creates a more toned body, which improves self-esteem and makes you feel sexier. It's not clear how much exercise you need to improve your sex life. Start with the standard recommendations -- 150 minutes of aerobic activity and two days of strength training a week.
Take Your Time
No matter how busy you are, sex is one part of your day that you shouldn't rush. Don't skimp on the foreplay. Those extra minutes that you spend touching and kissing each other help get you aroused and make sex more pleasurable. When you slow down, you also get more time to spend with your partner. That's good for your relationship overall.
Use Lubrication
Women's bodies naturally make their own lubricant, but sometimes it's in short supply. Hormonal changes around the time of menopause can cause vaginal dryness that makes for painful sex. A water-based lubricant is safest to use with condoms. But, silicone-based lubes are less irritating for anal sex.
Be Affectionate
Not every romantic encounter has to end in sex. You and your partner can find pleasure in many other ways. Take a bath together or give each other a sensual massage. Have a hot make-out session on the couch. Bring each other to orgasm through masturbation. Teach each other how you like to be touched. Or just cuddle.
Relax
Sex is a potent stress reliever, but it's hard to get in the mood when you're all keyed up. After a tough day, do something calming together to relax you. Listen to soft music. Practice relaxation exercises such as deep breathing or meditation. Research shows that mindfulness meditation helps women get more in tune with their bodies during sex.
Do Kegels
Kegels strengthen the pelvic floor muscles that support your bladder. They also relax the vagina to make sex more comfortable, improve blood flow down there, and make it easier to reach orgasm. To do these simple exercises, just tighten and relax the muscles you use to hold in pee. And they're not just for women. Men who practice Kegel exercises have better erections and more intense orgasms.
Plan an Overnight Getaway
Sometimes all you need to rev up your sex life is a change of scenery. Take a trip together. You don't have to go far, but certain settings -- like the ocean or mountains -- are ideal for rekindling romance. Turn off your cell phones and focus on each other. For an extra spark, pretend that you've just started dating -- or that you're strangers who've met up for a forbidden tryst.
See Your Doctor
Sometimes the solution to better sex is in your medicine chest. Some drugs, such as antidepressants and blood pressure medicines, can reduce your desire. The problem could also be a medical condition like heart disease, vaginal dryness, multiple sclerosis, or depression. Schedule a check-up to find out whether a health issue might be affecting your sex life. Be honest with your doctor about the problem, so you can find the right answer.
Talk to a Sex Therapist
A sex therapist is the person to see if something is bothering you in the bedroom. Therapists are licensed psychologists or social workers who can address problems such as a lack of desire, trouble getting an erection, or problems reaching orgasm. You can meet with a therapist alone or together with your partner.